The only thing that's a bigger secret than the New York Islanders' current failings is how this guy manages to keep such an outstanding moustache. They've lost their last thirteen games, they have a first overall pick who has his skating abilities questioned week after week, a first round pick who some expected to lead the league in scoring someday that hasn't even played a game yet due to injury, a mediocre defensive corps, and no real long term solution in goal. With the franchise in dire straits in a market that honestly doesn't really care about them, I really think that relocation is in their best interest. Thus, here are the three reasons that the New York Islanders should move to Kansas City.
1. The Tantalizing Opportunity To Be Named Something Other Than The Islanders
I think we can all agree that there is not team in the NHL with a worse name than the New York Islanders. And I can guarantee you that they will not pull a Los Angeles Lakers and keep their old name when they relocate venues. Here are some possible names I was considering for them:
The Kansas City Could You Please Stop One Puck Ricky?
The Kansas City Konopkas
The Kansas City Hoarders (For all the first round picks they get)
In all seriousness though, it's time to bring back the Kansas City Scouts.
2. The New Arena
It seems like years that Charles Wang has been begging for the undertaking of his LightHouse Project... because it has been. It beats me why he'd ever want to put a hockey team in a light house, but to each his own. Either way Kansas City has an arena that can house them, and there's a serious contingency of people within the city that are clamoring for an NHL team. Unfortunately, there's no clever naming to be done of their potential new home, as its owned by, and named after, Sprint. Then again though, with the way Sprint is bleeding customers, that opportunity could open up real soon.
3. The Franchise Sucks
Let's face it, it has for a long time, and it will for a long time. Unless you're going to fashion your team in the likes of the Phoenix Coyotes or the Nashville Predators, you are not going to win on a budget. And as long as the Isles play on Long Island, they will have to win on a budget. The market just isn't large enough, or enthusiastic enough to sustain a winner. The sweaters are ugly, the arena is ugly, the name is bad, the franchise is run atrociously, the team doesn't win, and they never have any stars. That, my friends, is a recipe for failure. Give the franchise to Kansas City, give them a shot to make it work. I know that many would lament the loss of the Rangers-Isles rivalry, but let's face it- the Rangers' greatest rivals are the Devils. It's been that way for a long time. As a Rangers fan, I can honestly say that I won't miss it too much. I haven't seen a real Islanders team in my time as a serious hockey fan, and I don't think I ever will.
You can reorganize the divisions easily too. Just put the Chiefs in the Central Division, and move the Columbus Blue Jackets to the Eastern Conference. Since they're not an expansion team, there would be no issues with putting them in the difficult Central Division.
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